I was reading the editorial of the lovely magazine Lions roar in which the editor Ross NIirveg discussed the story ‘ A Small good thing’ by Raymond Carver in which a couple have faced an overwhelming tragedy, the devastating loss of their only child . They are however pestered by phone calls from the local baker who unaware of the tragedy wants them to collect the boys birthday cake ordered before his demise . This leads to an angry confrontation when the parents reach the bakery at night and the mother overcome by hurt , grief and anger lashes out at him. The baker after coming to know about the terrible misfortune is overcome by sorrow and guilt and apologises profusely to the grief stricken couple . Since it was almost midnight, he offers the couple cinnamon rolls saying that in such times of grief it was important to keep eating , since eating was a small good thing in a time like this .

I was reflecting on this story and reminiscing over few incidents in my life, and I realized how true yet profound this simple advice was . When we were in our 1st year MBBS a friend of ours lost his father unexpectedly. He had to go to Madras ( not then Chennai) to fly back home and four of us accompanied our devastated friend as the teachers felt that some company was needed at this time of grief . Our journey from Vellore to Madras was by bus, for the initial one hour the mood was melancholic and quiet and no one knew what to say . Then we started talking a bit. By the time we reached airport we were all quite famished and had various snacks and cold drinks in the airport . This cheered us all a bit and our friend who had not said a word till then also opened up and we were soon chatting and even laughing. When we finally bade farewell to our friend and left from there we had the feeling that we had been on a meaningful picnic . Later on our friend Manoj told us that though he was completely shattered on getting the news of his fathers death, he always remembered that journey with us fondly because it gave him a lot of comfort and cheer and strength to face things.

Another incident imprinted on my memory was when my elder brother flunked in 7th standard and had to repeat the year . Now at that time in the eighties failing a year in the small academically oriented town like Jamshedpur, was considered nothing short of a major calamity . My mother came with the wretched report card in the morning and started wailing from the moment she stepped in the house . My father came back in the afternoon and was a mixture of extreme anger , shock and sadness. I doubt if we had anything to eat in the afternoon. By evening the atmosphere in the house was sombre and grim as if some unexpected death had taken place . Both me and my brother would give each other nervous smiles for want of knowing what to say . Then around 8 pm ( by which time the mood was almost unbearable) in rolled in one of my favourite Uncle and his wife with smiles and with a load of goodies to eat. My Uncle began narrating and regaling us with uproarious stories of his naughty childhood and failures and forced us to eat the pastries and sandwiches. We then realized how terribly hungry we were and soon we were all having a great time. It must have been a small gesture for my Uncle and Aunt , but for us two brothers it meant a lot and gave us hope that the world had not ended yet

It is not that these small good things are only about food , we find them everywhere if we were to quieten our minds a bit. At this moment we may be overwhelmed by many problems, added to it is the fear and anxiety about the Corona Pandemic and the future seems a bit uncertain . But lets pause for a minute , maybe take a walk till the balcony and just open our senses fully to the present moment . Then we can have a glimpse of the vast blue expansive sky and the sun smiling cheerfully , our senses now can pick up the sound of the birds chirping at a distance and we also feel the soft breeze on our skin. We realize that life is not so bad actually , we may then look around and notice our kids and partner and feel grateful that they are around us and healthy . Perhaps a cup of steaming hot coffee or tea materializes and our joy is doubled. The problems have not disappeared and are still there waiting to be tackled but we can deal with them one by one . One problem at a time, but let us first enjoy these small lovely moments of presence. Life is good after all , these small gifts ( which are not really small) were always there but were obscured by our thoughts and worries and the overactive mind . These small things help us reconnect with ourselves and bring us home. We just need to pause once in a while , return to the present moment and cherish the small good things of life .😊